I often speak about God’s dream for the world–that our world would become a place of shalom, meaning peace and wholeness and well-being. When I invite people to the communion table, for example, I often say that at the communion table we embody God’s dreams for a world where there will be no more tears, no hunger, no injustice.
The American Dream is something else. It suggests that we’re all responsible and capable of creating success for ourselves. And that success is defined largely in terms of wealth and the quantity of stuff, or the kinds of stuff, that we can acquire.
Dunham reminds us in her book that the drafters of the U. S. Constitution had in mind a democratic society with equality of opportunity, in which individual freedom would be balanced with the common good. (p3) That’s something we don’t talk about much–the common good, and how we all contribute to it.
Success is too often defined by money, power, and position, not by a life well lived.
So, what is a life well lived? I’m asking myself that. What would my life look like, if it was well lived?
I know that one of the things I struggle with is feeling that I have “enough”, or I have all I need, that I have the right things, and I don’t need more or different or better things. Sometimes I do need more, different or better things, but a lot of times, I don’t!
It’s so easy to use the language of “should” when talking about money and stuff. But I don’t find that “should” language helps me change very much. I think I need to better understand the roots of my feelings, in order to make conscious decisions and commitments, rather than being controlled under the table by my fears and whatever else I find in this process.
Dunham suggests seven “Graceful Living” concepts, and I’m going to attempt to work through them one at a time in upcoming posts. They are: abundance, frugality, simplicity, generosity, sustainability, justice, and Sabbath.
~ This is part of a series reflecting on Laura Dunham’s book, Graceful Living: Your Faith, Values, and Money in Changing Times. ~
Americans who have chosen to spend time outside of their own country and culture for any length of time may have a very different perspective. I grew up in Canada and have lived in France, Mexico and England. They think differently about some of these issues.
The value system here insists that working harder and longer is somehow a wiser, better choice than living more simply in a smaller space — and having more time and energy for your friends, family, pets, other interests beyond working even harder to accumulate even more stuff to show how “productive” and “successful” you are. It works beautifully for the corporate interests whose political and economic power has only recently been called into question. But is it really how everyone wants to live? No!
I spent the evening last night with seven friends my age, (mid 50s, suburban NY), most of whom earn more than three times my income. They didn’t seem any happier, in their bigger homes with mortgages and high taxes, working at jobs they dislike. But bucking the system means knowing there IS another way and finding friends whose values match and validate yours. That’s not always easy here. People see me in a one bedroom apartment (owned) and feel sorry for me. I’m much happier with my choices than some of the people I’m supposed to be envying.